RAPUNZEL AND THE HELICOPTER WITCH

Once upon a time there was a man and his wife who lived next door to a witch of great might, who had a beautiful vegetable garden. One day the wife, who was pregnant, looked out the window at the witch's garden and saw a beautiful bed of rampion. Rampion is a green, leafy lettuce­-like vegetable. She developed a strong craving for the rampion and began to pine away for it. Her husband climbed over the wall into the witch's garden to get some rampion but was caught by the wicked witch. She allowed him to take as much rampion as he wished on one condition - that the child that would come into the world must be given to her. When the child was born, the witch came and took her away. She named the baby girl Rapunzel, which is another name for rampion. When Rapunzel was 12 years old, the witch hid her away in a tower in the woods, for she did not want Rapunzel to be contaminated by the outside world, which the witch found deplorable. She hovered over Rapunzel to protect her. That is why she is called the Helicopter Witch. She was always telling Rapunzel how much better things had been when she was a girl and how bad they were in the present age, like those dreadful Adam Sandler movies, for example.

How will Rapunzel ever meet prince Charming and live happily ever after? Well, the answer has something to do with the Internet, My Space, a Harley Davidson, a GPS system and the Big Bad Wolf.